Thursday, September 15, 2011

Ok, I'm going a bit deep here. . .

As I watch and read my favourite TV shows, movies and books, there's always a part of me that's left aching inside. As I watch the heroine find that perfect love, be betrayed by that love and then finally end up with him, I am always left with that sense of longing. Longing that I had the same.
Like every girl on this planet, or at least I think, I wish for that one great love that would mean the end of life as I know it.  Yes, I realise that I'm quoting P.S I Love You, and my reply to the silent "Ahem, you're stealing a line out of a movie," is yes, I am. It's a good line.

I long for that one person who I feel like a real individual to, not just a piece of meat, a "buddy" to hang around or "that chick". I yearn for that amazing guy who I can't wait to see that day, that amazing guy that takes my breath away with just one look. That amazing guy who doesn't care if I'm having a bad hair day, or that I'm snapping at everyone who twitches in my direction.
That guy that everything just flows with. . .

I wish for that one person that I could cry, sob and wail infront of who would just hold me until I was ready to calm down. I wish for that guy who would just chuckle after I broke a heel at my brother's wedding, and I wish for the guy that would convince me to dance bare foot.

I dream of what he'd look like sometimes. What do his eyes look like? Does he have an amazing smile? Does he have a kind face, or is there an air of mischief and playfulness somewhere in there?
I could drive myself crazy sometimes thinking about it.
I don't think I even have a type.

I don't care if he's short or tall, and I couldn't care less if he were rich. There's no place in my heart for cheating, and it doesn't matter to me if he likes rugby, soccer or even ballet. I'm not really the jealous type, but I guess I haven't had much practice to be that type. I've never had a boyfriend. I've been asked out, sure, but never by someone I actually really liked. I've liked many people, but somehow those ones never seem to see me the way I see them.

I've had my heart more or less broken before. I say more or less because after the whole story, my heart was saddened more than anything else. I say saddened, because well, this was a major deal for me if I could have the one guy I really liked, like me back. Oh, I guess it would have felt like I wasn't a complete loser when it came to guys.

I don't know. I don't feel like a loser. I figure my time will come.

So yeah, I dream of true love.